This post is named after one of my favorite songs, which was released by The Manic Street Preachers in 1998. The song was about the Spanish Civil War, and the idealism that influenced volunteers from around the world to enlist in the International Brigade, which fought against Franco's fascist insurrection. The the songs name was taken from the above Republican (i.e. left-wing) poster at the time. A young child that was murdered by the Nationalists appears on the poster with the warning at the bottom: “If you tolerate this, your children will be next.”
I am not speaking of the Spanish Civil was, neither am I attempting make you ardent socialists like myself. I am addressing the issue of childhood sexual abuse in our country. This post is influenced by confusednaijababe: http://confusednaijagirl.blogspot.com/2007/01/culture-of-silence.html, and overwhelmednaijababe: http://overwhelmednaijababe.blogspot.com/2007/01/ordinary-day.html
The point I am trying to make is that the volunteers that fought in the International Brigade were idealistic enough to believe that they could make a difference, and they were prepared to fight for what they believed in, if we can muster half of their zeal then maybe we can end, the culture of silence, which is prevalent in our society. We must play our part to protect our children, because if we tolerate this, then our children will be next.......
Overwhelmed, here is a little something i posted on your blog, I dont think you noticed it earlier:
I hope you have the patience to accomodate a guest, even one quite as boorish as myself. Overwhelmed, You are a survivor and not a victim. For you to turn out this way, shows that it will take more than those bad experiences to break your spirit.
Here is to overwhelmed our friend has stared adversity in the eye and calmly stated; "do your worst".
Keep your chin up sweetheart......
15 comments:
FIRST!!!
LEMME GO READ
I have a lotttt of things 2 say
1. I agree with you that Overwhelmed and that seriously confused chic have come a long way. No1 knows what it's like until they're in their shoes. Thank God they have made it through.
2. But baby, did you really have 2 call Overwhelmed a sweetheart? That chic is nuts!
3. I know you might think that Guy Horny affects my feelings for you, but you are wrong!! In fact sef, you're my number one. But baby, you need 2 show more romance o. You know it was my loneliness that drove me in2 Guy Horny's arms ehn. You're the BIGGEST sugar cube in my tea, the fattest, thickest, yummiest grain of rice in my plate, and the longest strand of hair in my comb. Pumpkin pie, you know I love you oh, ehn. You're my baby, my boo, my sweetheart, my ripe plantain, my hot suya, my peach, sweet cake, my .... ah, do you want me 2 go on? Don't let a horny guy come bw our love oh ehn. You know I know that thing that only I know, and I didn't tell any1 ur secret oh. Doesn't that prove my luff 4 u, ehn?
UNboorish male, c'mon give me some sugar... pweeeeaaase.... *sobs*
True talk. If we tolarate this our children will be next, but its not such about tolerance alone its to do with being helpless and powerless. I havent been a victim of abuse but reading OWNB and CNG blogs I felt powerless,I felt despair and I just wanted to cry, cry that a child of 14 thought that she had to protect her mother instead of it being the other way round. I'm gonna be a mother some day, and this has only taught me to listen to my children and put them first before my needs. My heart goes out to OWNB and CNG but I'm extremely proud of them even though I dont know them, but i'm proud they were able to turn it around and their in the process of healing, no longer afraid of the dark. Good on them.
Thank you so much boorish male. It is so true. I feel so angry that our culture in general tolerates sexual abuse. Thanks for the post again
Good post @ boorish
@cheetarh
"but its not such about tolerance alone its to do with being helpless and powerless"
theres power in numbers abi how do they say it, if more people come together to fight this then we can change things..
Very true Mr Boor. I also think parents need to be vigilant and to make sure the kids know that they can acome to them anytime. Many Nigerian kids will tell of how petrified they were of their parents while growing up. That kind of parenting is archaic and needs to stop.
One of the scariest things I have ever heard come out of the mouth of someone whose opinion I respect is that a husband's sexual abuse of his children is not grounds for divorce. So really it is not up to our parents generation, it is up to ours to stamp this out, cos if we are waiting for them, we're gonna wait long.
Erm, guess who needs 2 update!
Happy birthday boor..............u've finally left d twenty-something generation
It appears our culture tolerates sexual abuse because we refuse to accept that it happens,it is viewed as an "oyinbo thing".
I guess that is why we have never really developed means to resolve this issue or even aid the victims.
There are places in the country at the moment who can help the victims but are hardly mentioned because it is not as newsworhty as telling people that Nike Osinowo just dumped some guy or also because there are no funds to help manage them.
I have a friend who was abused by a close relation and she "came out" at a fellowship.
The irony was that a lot of people started evading her afterwards.In the end she was like what was the use.
She only came out because she felt that she could help other victims.
We might never be able to stamp sexual abuse but at least we shouldn't pretend it doesn't exist.Every little step by an individual helps,u dont necessarily have to start on a large level,starting from your home is all good.
@vera
my love for you is everlasting, it is as perrenial as the grass, it is all that keeps me going in this cold world of ours.......
@cheetarah
Nice one
@confused
Anytime sweetheart
@dami
about to check out your blog
@Tminx
it is such a shame, but i will not be able to trust my children with anyone. Child abuse is so prevalent in Nigerian society, most people have a story to tell.
@snazzy
That is so sad
@nefara
I hope your friend is ok
Is it more prevalent in Nigeria than anywhere else or is it just that there's a culture of silence...great post anyway
Thanks my angel... thanks
Sexual predators are evil.....true evil!
i had an idea of what to say...till i saw divine lavender's picture. Lawd have mercy.
There are so many horrible things bout that country that our elders have no problem sweeping under the mat.
The time is now...a lot of ppl are speaking out about this evil and something needs to be done about it. Silence just enables these monsters.
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